Time Flies
by the charmed citlali
Summary: Eight years after Chosen, Buffy's 30th birthday
1. Buffy

I wrote this short fic, because I was inspired by A. Price's wonderful story "For Her". It's set eight years after "Chosen", it's Buffy's thirtieth birthday and the gang gathers round to celebrate. 

  


Warning: Buffy/Spike, but it's a good read, so don't knock it. 

  


Disclaimer: I don't own anything that is original BtVS. The rest of the characters are from my own mind. 

  


Rating: Tame 

  


  


Time Flies

  


Chapter One: Buffy

  


She watched the two girls swing on the swing set. Laughing, smiling, she almost forgot what she had been through before them. They were the start of her new life. The normalcy she had been so desperately seeking was found when her oldest daughter had been born. When Hope was born, she came out red-faced and screaming with wisps of blond hair, she looked exactly like her mother. Three years later, Madison was born on a cold day in April, unusual for sunny California, she wasn't crying nor was she breathing. Buffy spent a horrendous two weeks in the hospital worrying over her newborn baby girl. She'd hold her little hand through the plastic box and weep softly. This little one was a harsh reminder of her father. Light brown hair and gray-blue eyes, like the sky after a storm. That's how much her life had changed. A full 360 degree turn about. She had gone from worrying about impending doom and apocalypses to nap times and bath times. Buffy loved her little girls more than anything in the world. She couldn't remember life before them, or when she did, she never let the girls know about it.

She woke up at night, shivering in her bed, gasping for air, from nightmares that had been all too real. Of times in the long-gone Sunnydale, when she was The Slayer. Demons and Vampires invaded her dreams, and no matter what she did, they kept coming back. The worst was the one about the last day in Sunnydale. When she had left the man she loved most to die. She had barely realized how much she loved him and it was too late. Once again, she watched her lover die. 

Buffy forced those thoughts out of her head. She couldn't be reminded of him. "Mommy!" Hope ran over to her. She wrapped her arms around Buffy's neck. 

"What's wrong, sweetie?" She asked. She saw Madison walking guiltily over to her mother and sister. "Madison, what did you do?"

"She threw sand in my hair!" Hope pointed a pudgy, little girl finger at her younger sister. 

"She said I was 'dopted," Madison pouted. She had a full bottom lip, just like her daddy.

Buffy pulled the two year old onto her lap with the other one. She held them close. "You're not adopted. Neither of you are. Both of you had a good daddy. And I'm a good mommy right?" 

"You're the best," Hope said kissing and hugging her. 

"That's right, now don't be mean to each other. One day, all you'll have is each other," Buffy said.

"Like you and Aunt Dawn?" Hope asked.

"Yeah, like me and Aunt Dawn. Go play," she said sending them off, back to the playground. Hope ran off, but Madison stayed back. "What is it?" 

With her finger in her mouth, Madison smiled shyly at her. "I love you, mommy," she said then ran to join her sister.

Tears welled in Buffy's eyes. All that little girl had to do sometimes was look up at Buffy, and she'd burst into tears. When they asked what was wrong, Buffy'd make up some lame excuse like allergies or onions, something that the girl's would believe. It was eight years later, and she still had trouble with it. It was getting dark, another hour or so, and they'd have to get in doors. Maybe Dawn or Willow called. It was after all almost a week to her birthday, and the gang made it a point to get together and reminisce that day. Christmastime, Hanukkah, Thanksgiving, and a day in May were the other times they all got together, but that was happy time and kind of hectic. 

"Girls!" She called out to them. She waved to them, "One last ride down the slide and we have to go inside."

"Okay!" They called back. After they were done, they all walked back, holding hands, to their modest apartment. 

"Can we come back tomorrow?" Hope asked. 

"Of course," Buffy replied. She gave them baths and got them to bed. Kissed them goodnight, took a shower herself, put on her pajamas and flipped on the TV. She surfed through the channels, passing up the primetime sitcoms and dramas, until settling on MTV. She watched the music videos, without much interest. After a while, they all looked the same and sounded the same. The phone rang, startling Buffy and she reached over and clicked the 'talk' button. "Hello?"

  



	2. Dawn

Chapter Two: Dawn

  


"Come on, Buffy," Dawn said to herself. She didn't have much time until the twins woke up from their afternoon naps and the screaming would ensue. She slammed the phone down angrily. That girl needs an answering machine. "Billy!" She called out. A ruddy-faced six-year old, donning a baseball cap and a baseball glove walked in from the back door. 

"What, Mom?" he asked throwing a baseball in the air and catching it with his glove.

"Go check on the twins for me," she said stirring a pot of spaghetti sauce at the stove.

"Why can't you?" he whined.

"And I'm cooking dinner before your dad gets home. Now go," she said.

"Aw, Mom, I'm playing outside," he protested.

Dawn sighed irritably, "And if you want to continue, you'll do as I ask. And wash your face."

He glared at her and she stuck out her tongue. He laughed and went to the twin's room. Dawn picked up the phone again, and dial her sister's number. After twelve rings, she hung up. "Grr," she growled. Buffy was probably out with the girl's at the playground. Her and Buffy used to love doing that. Her favorite times were when Buffy would push her on the swings. But that had all been a fake memory. Given to her when the monks made her human. Now, she was used to it. The fact that she was once being the all-powerful and destructible Key, was now just part of her life. 

She didn't just shrug off her old life in Sunnydale, like her sister had. She had told her husband about it. Jack didn't have any trouble with it. His sister was a witch and his parents had been killed by demons when he was a toddler and they were raised by their grandmother who was also a witch. He had grown up knowing and learning about mysticism and all that good stuff. 

"Can I go play now?" Billy asked. 

Dawn looked down at her little boy. His cheeks were still red and there was dirt on his nose. She rolled her eyes, "Fine, but be in before sundown." The boy beamed at her and ran outside. She grabbed the phone and decided to call Willow.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Willow."

"Dawnie, hey!" Willow's voice lit up. "How are you?"

"I'm fine. How've you been?" Dawn asked.

"Can't complain."

"And Kennedy?" 

"She's great." Dawn heard muffled voices from the other end of the phone. "Kennedy says hi," Willow said.

"Tell her I said hi. How's Selene?" Dawn asked.

Willow smiled. "She's getting so big," Willow said of her adopted daughter. "She'll be getting ready to say her first word soon. I thought she said 'bird' but it ended up being gas."

Dawn giggled. "That's great, Will."

"And Billy and the twins?"

Dawn sighed, 'They're all a handful. Jack helps out so much, but, I can't wait to go back to work."

"How is Jack?" 

Dawn smiled, "He's good. He asked about you the other day. Wanted to know if his sister had talked to you."

"Sheila called the other day. She still wants me to help her run the new coven, but, I think I'll have to pass. At least until Selene gets a little older," Willow told her.

"Good. Have you talked to Buffy?"

"I talked to her the other day..."

"And?"

"Next week's still set. I called Faith and Andrew," the red haired witch replied.

"Cool. I saw Xander today... Billy! Get off that ladder, now!" Dawn yelled out the window. Willow winced and held the phone away from her ear. 

"Is Dawn yelling at Billy?" Kennedy asked. 

Willow nodded. "Yep." 

Kennedy laughed and picked Selene up from the playpen. "You're not going to be like Bad Boy Billy are you?" She asked the black haired toddler. Selene smiled and Kennedy took her into the kitchen to feed her. 

"Sorry, Will," Dawn apologized. "Either that kid's going to kill me, or I'm gonna wring his neck, whichever comes first." 

Willow laughed. "Well, I'd better go. I'll see you in a few days."

"Yeah,' bye Willow. Love you," Dawn said.

"Love you." And they hung up.

Dawn sprinkled some garlic powder and salt into her pot of sauce. The front door flew open. "I'm home!" Jack announced a little too loudly. The babies woke up and started to cry, Billy raced in the house cover in mud and jumped into his daddy's arms. Dawn rushed to the nursery and picked up Alex, the one who had started to cry and checked on Gabriel, who was still asleep. She went back into the kitchen where Jack was tickling Billy on the floor.

"Jack, he's filthy," Dawn said.

"Hello, my love," Jack looked up and planted a kiss on Dawn's lips.

"Hi baby. How was you day?" She asked turning down the flame under her pot.

Jack shrugged, "Boring. As most computer software jobs are. And your's?"

"Let's see, I fed the kids. The twins managed to throw applesauce and peaches on the wall. I cleaned that up, gave them a bath, got Billy off the television set..."

"Uncle Xander came to pick me up," Billy spoke up.

Dawn nodded, "Xander came by with Nicole and Ryan to drop a few things off for the party and took them all to Mc Donald's. Got him out of my hair," she said looking at Billy. "Then I spent the rest of the day trying to get a hold of my sister."

Jack nodded. "Fun stuff." Just then Gabriel also started to wail. Dawn went for him but Jack stopped her. "I'll get him. You try to call Buffy again."

Dawn smiled and kissed her husband. "Okay. Thank you. Oh, can you get Billy into the tub?"

"Mo-om!" 

"Don't even start with me, William," She warned. "You're caked in mud."

Billy opened his mouth to protest, when Jack scooped him up. "Let's go, before your mother pops a vein."Billy giggled and Dawn threw him the evil eye.

Dawn drained the noodles into a strainer as she held the phone with her shoulder. Again, nothing. Jack came back with a fresh and clean little boy and put the twins in their high chairs. They sat down to dinner. Dawn fed the twins who proceeded to make a mess and Jack practically had to bribe Billy to eat his salad. After the battle/dinner, Dawn and Jack gave the twins a bath, read Billy a story, and put the three of them to bed. 

Exhausted, Dawn collapsed on the couch, next to Jack, who handed her the phone. Dawn groaned and dialed. The phone rang three times before Buffy picked it up. "Hello?" she heard.

"Buffy! Finally!"

"Hello to you too, Dawn."

"Hi. Where've you been?" Dawn asked impatiently as she disregarded Buffy's sarcasm.

"At the playground with the girls. What's up?"

"Oh not much. How are my adorable nieces?"

"Adorable. And the boys?"

Dawn sighed, "Adorable and impossible. Do you want one?" 

Buffy chuckled, "No way. What's up with the late night call?"

"I've been calling you all day and just barely got a hold of you," Dawn replied.

"Oh."

"Yeah. So, your birthday's in a few. I thought it'd be cool to party over here. The place is bigger and we could have like a barbecue then put all the kids to sleep and hang," Dawn said.

Buffy thought, "That sounds great."

Dawn smiled. "Okay then, I'll see you Friday, around four?"

"Okay Dawnie."

"Okay, I love you Buffy."

"Love you too, Dawn."

  



	3. Xander

Chapter Three: Xander

"Am I gonna have to turn the car around?" Xander asked looking into the rearview mirror at the squabbling children in the back seat.

"No!" They said.

"Then quit hitting each other," Xander said. The two stopped but continued to make faces at each other. 

"Kids!" The woman in the passenger seat turned around. "We'll go back."

"Sorry, Mom," they mumbled. 

"Thanks hon," Xander smiled at his wife. 

The beautiful woman smiled, "Anytime."

The Harris' were off to the mall to find Buffy a birthday present. Xander couldn't believe his best friend was thirty. Actually, he still couldn't believe that eight years had gone by so fast. Eight years, and he was married and had two kids. His wife was a gorgeous Latino woman from Los Angeles, and their kids were beautiful. He was glad they got their mother's looks. They got his sense of humor though, and he couldn't decide if that was a good thing. 

He parked the mini-van and soon they were walking around the mall. Teresa pushed Nicole in the stroller since she was only three. And Xander held Ryan's hand. They walked by stores and the kids begged to go into Kay-Bee's toy store. 

"What do you get a thirty year old?" Xander asked Treas. 

Teresa shrugged, "I dunno. Ask me in five years."

"Four," Xander put his arm around her. "You're twenty-six. Good try though."

Teresa smiled, "Damn. Thought that one would slip by you." She kissed him.

"Dad, can we get Aunt Buffy this?" Ryan asked holding up a G.I Joe.

Xander frowned, "How about something a little less masculine. Try finding her something a girl would like."

"Barbie?" Nicole asked hopefully looking down the pink drenched aisle.

"Maybe next year," Xander said touching her nose, she giggled.

"You're seriously going to get her something from a toy store?" Teresa asked.

Xander shrugged. "Why not? It'll be like a fun, little time warp." 

Teresa rolled her eyes. "Okay." 

They settled on a princess set, complete with tiara, wand and feather boa, and a stuffed pig that looked like Mr. Gordo. Buffy had lost hers in Sunnydale. Of course, the kids got away with getting a toy too, the soldier action-figure for Ryan and Barbie for Nicole. They ate at the food court and shopped around a little more. Xander bought Teresa a set of earrings she had been eyeing and bought everyone little presents to give at the party. 

It felt good to splurge like this. He had always been strapped for money. Being the expert at odd jobs and such, until he finally decided just to settle down and do his woodwork. People from all over came to his store to buy his one of a kind chests, jewelry boxes, dressers, tables and other stuff he made. Teresa, who had managed her family's restaurant in L.A, helped Xander with all the book keeping and inventory. Business was good, and after Xander's rich uncle Morty left him a nice inheritance, which shocked the hell out of him, they were living pretty well. Finally. 

By the time they got home, it was dark and the kids were already asleep. Xander and Teresa carried the snoring Ryan and thumb-sucking Nicole into their rooms, prodded them into their pajamas and kissed them good night. 

Xander and Teresa settled into their own bed and Xander wrapped his arms around his wife, sighing as he did so.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"Hmm? Nothing," Xander replied.

"No, you're thinking about something," she turned to face him. "I know you, Harris. I can see those rusty gears turning." She caressed his hair back.

Xander sighed, "I was just thinking about stuff."

"Stuff?"

"Yeah. Eight years have gone by."

"Since the...?"

"Yeah, since the."

"Was she pretty?"

Xander was taken aback. He had told Teresa about losing Anya and about what he'd been through in Sunnydale. She completely understood, but had never asked about it or about Anya. She always let him talk and she listened.

He swallowed a lump in his throat. "Yeah. She was pretty, and strong, and funny."

"You loved her a lot."

"Yeah."

She settled back into his arms, "Would I have liked her?"

"No," he said simply. "No one liked her at first. She was, uh, outspoken."

"Do you think about her?"

"Everyday," he answered honestly. He held Teresa tight. "But now I have you, and we have the kids. I'd never give that up. I love you."

"I love you too, Xander."

They fell asleep in each other's arms, like they had every night before. He'd never let Teresa go, but he'll never forget Anya. Eight years had gone by fast, but if he closed his eyes sometimes, it was just like yesterday.

  



	4. Willow

Chapter Four: Willow

  


Willow hummed a little tune as she threw some hellebore, fleabane, bindweed, salamander eyes stuff into a pot. She was working on Buffy's present. Something she had been trying for almost ten years. And the witch was gonna get it right this time. She began to chant. "Spirits of the light, I invoke thee. Let the gloom of darkness part before you, let the moonlight be made pale by your presence. Spirits..." A greenish circle of light appeared and hovered over the bowl. "Spirits of light, grant my wishes... bring forth the energy that controls all life. Solis Luminarium." 

The circle of light exploded and contracted into a bright, white-yellow ball. Presto! Buffy's ball o' sunlight. Willow smiled happily at Selene who watched from her crib. "Did you see that Selene? Mommy's good."

"Of course she is," Kennedy replied breezing into the room. She kissed Willow on the forehead. "She's the best."

"Thanks, baby," Willow said. She caught the ball in pretty, UV-protected, glass bottle and examined it. "Do you know how long it's taken me to do this?"

"How long?" Kennedy asked picking up toys and throwing them into the toy chest Xander made them. 

"Ten years," Willow sighed. "Ten years, I've been working on this for her, and now she really doesn't need it."

Kennedy looked at the bottle, "Yeah, but she'll love it."

Willow wrapped the bottle in tissue paper and put it in a small gift bag. "I hope so. I hope it's not like a bad reminder for her."

Kennedy shook her head, "It won't be."

"Yeah but, she quit slaying after David..." Willow took the bottle from the package. "It's not a good gift. What was I thinking?"

Kennedy took the bottle from Willow. "You were thinking with your heart. That's the best gift anyone could give."

"But..."

"But what? So she quit. It wasn't the first time. And it's not like she really needed to do it anymore. There are enough of us around, she can live a normal life now."

Willow looked at her slayer. She wasn't fully convinced, but she knew Kennedy was right. "All right."

"All right." Kennedy handed her back the bottle and Willow put it back into the bag. Kennedy and Willow kissed and Kennedy stood up. "I'll go back the baby bag and we'll leave in an hour."

"Okay," Willow watched her lover walk into the other room. That girl was hot. She didn't feel guilty thinking about it either. Not anymore. Of course, she missed Tara and loved her, but she couldn't let it consume her, not again. Plus, she was in love with Kennedy, they'd been through hell together. Literally. Kennedy, Faith, Rona and Vi got trapped in a hell dimension a year after Sunnydale, and Willow, Buffy, Xander, Dawn, Giles, Robin, Angel, Fred, Wesley, Gunn and Andrew, all helped to get them out. Willow wasn't going to lose another lover, so she and Buffy went there, were almost eaten by a giant bug demon, and saved them from being sacrificed into a fiery pit. It was wild. 

That had been the last time they were all together. Giles took most of the new slayers to England, help them train with the few remaining Watchers. Angel and his gang returned to their lives, Dawn became pregnant and had Billy at eighteen, which of course made Buffy want to kill her. Dawn was the first to get married and settle down. Xander, Willow and Faith all followed Buffy to the Cleveland Hellmouth, where Xander met Teresa, his wife, while battling a Grillk demon on the college campus. They married a year later and moved back to California where she was from. Willow and Kennedy went to help Angel in L.A. Faith and Robin headed back to New York, while Andrew decided to stay and help Giles, until he met Veronica at a Stargate: SG 1 convention and romance ensued. 

Buffy went back to help Dawn four years after Sunnydale. She crashed her car into a pole on a stormy night and was unconscious when a young man found her. They fell in love, married and had Hope. A year later, David, Buffy's husband, was killed by a group of renegade vampires who wanted to send the slayer a message. Of course, after that Buffy took off, left Hope in Willow's care, and was gone for a year. When Buffy came back, she was better. Willow didn't now what happened that entire time, but nine months later, Buffy had Madison. 

It had been a strange eight years. But everything seemed to be coming together now. Their lives weren't as crazy as they had been. They were all married and had families. Willow, Xander, Dawn, and Buffy all lived within twenty miles of each other in Calabasas, California. Life was good, and soon they'd be together again, to celebrate Buffy's birthday. 

"Are you ready?" Kennedy asked carrying a small bag and handing Willow her purse. 

"Yep, let's go." Willow scooped Selene up and buckled her in her car seat. 

After a few minutes, Kennedy glanced over at Willow who was looking out the window and sighing. "What's wrong?" 

"Oh nothing."

"Thinking about seeing them?"

"Yeah. The last time we were all together was Christmastime. That was almost a month ago."

"And it was warm," Kennedy noted as she passed a blue car. 

Willow nodded. "You know, maybe we should make it a point to get together more often."

"More often? We get together every major holiday. And sometime in between," Kennedy told her.

"Oh, I'm sorry 'Ms. I Have a Rich Family and We Hate Each Other'..."

"Hey!"

Willow smoothed her hair back. "I'm sorry."

Kennedy shrugged. "It's true. I hardly ever saw my parents growing up. Only every Christmas and Thanksgiving, when the boarding school had to send us home."

"It's okay, I never saw my parents either. And I lived in then same house," Willow said.

"But you're right. We should all see each other more. It's not like we have lives or anything." Kennedy said.

Willow sighed again. But it was a happy sigh. "That's just it. Now we have lives. Lives with families. No more demons or vampires to slay. Just normal lives."

"Okay how normal are we?" Kennedy asked. "We're a gay, you're a witch, I'm a slayer, Buffy's a slayer, Faith's a slayer, Dawn's a Key, Xander's, well, Xander, Giles is British, and Andrew's a dork. You call that normal?"

Willow smiled. "As normal as they come."

  


(I had to make up the rest of Willow's spell which I took from the episode "Triangle". If you know the right one, please let me know, and I can fix it. Thanks!).

  



	5. Heartache

  


Chapter Five: Heartache

Buffy watched her little girls play on the apartment playground again. They did this every other day. Buffy wanted the girls to have some kind of stable pattern in their lives. She figured they had a happy life, for not having a daddy. They both had a daddy, just not one that was around. David was in heaven no doubt watching over his little girl's. Hope hardly remembered him. She was too young. She didn't even recognize Buffy, when she finally returned and Hope was almost three. 

Buffy beat herself up every day for leaving Hope. It's not like she didn't leave her in good care. She was with Willow and Kennedy, any more protection, she would've had to be locked up inside Fort Knox. Buffy left, out on a personal vendetta, to find her husband's killers. It was the only time, Buffy had actually thought herself a killer. She was always The Slayer. Killing vamps and demons for the good of the world. But Buffy wasn't The Slayer then. She was still a slayer, but she didn't go as one. She went as a wife, and mother, to find her David's killers and... kill them. Willow understood, that's why she let Buffy go without much of a lecture. 

"Girls! Let's go!" Buffy called to them and they skipped over.

"Morrow's your birff-day, Mommy," Madison told her.

"And we're gonna see Auntie Dawn, Uncle Xander and Aunt Willow!" Hope said excitedly.

"That's right. So is Aunt Kennedy, Uncle Jack, Aunt Teresa, Andrew, Faith, and Robin. We're going over to Auntie Dawn and Uncle Jack's," Buffy reminded them.

"And they're bringing their kids?" Hope asked.

"Yep," Buffy nodded. 

"Yay!" The girl pranced around. 

Later that night, after the girls were in bed, Buffy went for a walk. The girls were safe, protected by a Protection spell Willow had cast the first day Buffy moved in. The air was cold, Buffy could see her breath. She zipped up her warm, leather jacket and stuffed her hands inside her pockets. She couldn't sleep, something was on her mind and she didn't know what it was. It was well after midnight, when Buffy stopped at the park. She sat on a metal bench.

"That blonde one looks like you."

Buffy shook her head, "She's going to be tall though."

"Good thing."

"Yeah."

"And the other? She's not his, is she?"

Buffy sighed. She had been dreading this conversation. "No."

The person behind her cleared his throat. "She's beautiful."

"She's looks like her daddy." Buffy said. "I hate that. Every time she looks at me I see him. Her eyes are just like his. And when she watched me she tilts her head, like he did. It hurts to look at her, sometimes." She started to cry. 

"I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault."

"Yes it is."

"Yes it is," Buffy agreed. "What are doing here?"

The person sat next to her. "It's your birthday. I wanted to be here." 

"You can't be here. I don't want you here."

"You don't really mean that, Buffy."

"Yes I do."

"You're not still mad at me?!"

"Yes I am!" She crossed her arms.

"For what? You left." He said.

"I left? You were alive and you didn't even try to find me. Five years, and you were alive. You left me, remember? You wanted to be all heroic." Her chin was quivering and she was shivering from the cold. But she didn't back down. He tried to put his arm around her put she stood up.

He stood up too. "God, Buffy! What can I do? What could I have done? If I had to do it over again, I'd do it the same way. And I'm sorry, okay? I just thought that you were better of with out me. And you were. 

"I wasn't! I hurt!" Tears were streaming down her cheeks. "I got married. I had a baby. Then he died. David died. He left. Just like everybody else."

He pulled her into his arms. She cried against his chest. She breathed in deeply, smelling him. She told him once that the smelling thing was weird. But she didn't realize that all it took was a smell to bring a memory. 

"Shh, love. Don't cry."

Buffy looked up into his blue-gray eyes. Eyes like the sky after a storm. He lifted her chin with his finger and their lips met. In a moment, everything exploded. As their desperate tongues rolled against each other, a flood of emotions poured out. Buffy remembered the steamy nights they had in Sunnydale, his smirk, the way he watched her move, every fight they had, every kiss, every exchange of blows and smart ass remarks. She remembered it all. How she ran into him in L.A while searching for David's killers, that heart-stopping moment when she thought she had lost her mind again. Seeing him alive, and human. The night they had dusted those vamps and made passionate love, and the birth of Madison. 

Suddenly she shoved him away. "No!" She wiped her mouth. "You can't try to make it better with a kiss."

Spike was at a loss. After all this time, she was still so hot and cold. "I know I can't make it better, but I'm here now. I want to be here."

"She's yours, you know, " Buffy said.

Spike's eyes widened. "Mine?"

Buffy scoffed, "You really are stupid."

Spike sat back down on the bench. "She's mine," he whispered, soaking in the information. He looked back at her, "What's her name?"

"Madison," she replied. "Her name is Madison. And the other is Hope."

"Madison," he repeated. "It's pretty." 

She nodded and looked at her watch. "It's going to be light soon. You'll have to..." she stopped before finishing that sentence. "Old habit," she shrugged.

He nodded. "Do you want to watch the sunrise?" 

Buffy shook her head. "No. I have to get back."

"Buffy, when...?"

"Tonight," she told him. "Come tonight. It's my birthday."

"Okay." He watched her walk away.

(I can't decide whether to end it here or keep going. I can. I've gotten the rest already written out. Review and let me know. Majority wins.)

  



	6. The Party

Chapter Six: The Party

(I knew it. I couldn't get away with that ending. So here's more... Enjoy!)

  


Faith pulled into Dawn's driveway. Robin got out and undid the car seat in the back. He handed Faith a tiny bundle. She peeked inside at her baby girl. The mocha colored baby yawned and Faith smiled. She looked at Robin and at her watch. "We're late."

"I told you to check if we had everything," Robin said. They walked to he front door and rang the doorbell.

"I told you not to forget her bottles," Faith replied.

"I didn't. You forgot the formula," he reminded.

Faith rolled her eyes and Jack opened the door. "Hey!" he greeted giving Faith a hug and shaking Robin's hand. "You guys are the last." 

"It was his/her fault!" They said simultaneously.

Jack laughed, "Okay." He leaned over to Robin, "It's was her fault, wasn't it?" He whispered. 

"Yeah," Robin chuckled.

"I heard that!" Faith glared.

Jack cleared his throat, "Ahem. Dawn's in the kitchen and everyone else is out back." He led them through the house. 

"Faith!" Dawn exclaimed when she saw the dark-haired slayer. Dawn was holding one of the twins on her hip and stirring dip at the same time. Her and Fait hugged and Dawn peered at the pink bundle in her arms.

"Her name's Belle," Robin told her.

"Oh," Dawn breathed. "She's beautiful."

"Thank you," Faith and Robin smiled at each other.

"I want a girl!" She said looking at Jack.

Jack threw up his hands. "Don't look at me like that. We'll do it, then end up with another boy that we can't get rid of him."

Dawn glared at her husband and handed the twin to him. "Everyone's out back. Buffy's the one with the crown."

Faith and Robin followed Jack outside to the huge backyard. Willow, Kennedy and Teresa were sitting and chatting, Andrew and his girlfriend, Veronica, a small mousy-looking girl with glasses, were setting the picnic tables and Xander was chasing the kids around.

The girls and Robin all hugged and said hello. "Where's Xander?" Faith asked."Oh, he's attacking the children," Teresa replied. 

"Rah! The Xander-Monster's gonna get you!" He roared sending the kids shrieking in laughter. 

"It's the lesser known Xander-demon, who scares small children with his lame monster impressions," Faith said.

"I've heard of those," Robin said. "They aren't dangerous."

"But can get to be quite annoying," Willow said.

"Annoying? Should we slay him?" Dawn asked setting down the dip and bowl of chips in front of them.

"I got some stakes in the car," Kennedy offered.

Xander glowered at the girls, "That's right everyone make fun of Xander, the butt monkey." 

They all laughed. 

"Where's Buffy?" Faith asked.

"Inside," Willow replied.

"Dawn said she was out here." 

"She said she wanted to change," Willow said.

Faith handed Belle to Robin and went inside. She walked through the house to the master bedroom, the only room with the door closed. She knocked softly on it. "Hey, B," she said using her nickname for Buffy. "You decent?" She opened the door slightly and peeked inside. Buffy was sitting on the king sized bed, crying. Faith opened the door and rushed in. "Buffy! What's wrong?" she asked startling Buffy.

"Faith, hey," she wiped her eyes and attempted a smile. She got up to hug the former rouge slayer.

Faith hugged her back and held her at arms length. "What are doing sitting in here and crying?"

"Sitting in here and crying," Buffy replied. "Where's Belle? I wanna see my god daughter."

"Uh uh," Faith raised an eyebrow, " No 'it's-my-party-and-I can-cry-if-I- want-to' excuses. What's up?"

Buffy shook her head, "Nothing, just thinking."

"Oh," Faith understood. "About David?"

Buffy blinked, deciding whether to lie or not. "Yeah, about David."

Faith put her arm around Buffy's shoulders, "Aw, B. It's okay. I get it. But it's been almost three years, you can move on. I'm sure he'd want you to." 'I did move on,' Buffy thought. 'Then I left.' She smiled at Faith. "You're right. Thank you. For understanding." 

Faith smiled, "That's my girl." She got the crown that had been lying next to Buffy and put it on her head. "Now, let's go party!" Faith started dancing around, leading a laughing Buffy out of the room. They went back to the party outside. Jack and Xander, were manning the grill. Andrew was arguing with Billy about who the best X-men character was.

"Nah uh!" Andrew said. "Wolverine first appeared in 'Alpha Fight'."

Billy shook his head, "He was in 'The Incredible Hulk #180'. 'Alpha Fight' was Spiderman and Wolverine."

"Veronica!" Andrew called.

"Sweetie, you're fighting with a six year old, and he's right," Veronica said in her soft voice. 

Andrew turned to Billy who crossed his arms smugly over his chest. Andrew's mouth gaped open and he glared at Billy. He huffed over and sat next to Veronica. Buffy chuckled softly shaking her head. Willow was feeding Selene baby food and talking with Teresa and Veronica, Kennedy was helping Dawn round up the kids. Faith saw Robin cradling their daughter in his arms. He was whispering to her a little lullaby. Faith smiled. She turned to Buffy, "This is what it's all about, isn't it?"

Buffy watched her friends. Friends wasn't strong enough a word to describe what they all shared and family was just a label. They were soul mates, forever entwined in each other's lives. Linked together by a bond stronger than any magic in the world. She wasn't sure if you were allowed to have more than one soul mate, but then again she wasn't much for following the rules. 

She looked at Faith, "Yeah, it is."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

  


After sitting down to their respective dinner of hamburgers, hot dogs, potato salad, jello salad which none of the adults ate except for Dawn, and all other yummy foods. 

"I'm stuffed!" Buffy announced, pushing her plate away and sitting back.

"I think I'll have to accept defeat too," Xander dropped his fork and adjusting his belt. "Or else the button on my pants is going to fly off and someone's gonna lose an eye."

Buffy giggled at her one-eyed friend. "Dawn, you made too much food."

Dawn who was munching on carrot sticks and barbecue sauce, shrugged, "Oh well, there'll be leftovers for tomorrow." 

"Bleah, not eating ever again," Willow said.

"We still have to have cake," Faith pointed out. 

"Cake?" Xander perked up. "Who has cake?"

"I thought you said you were full," Buffy said to Xander.

Xander looked at Buffy, "There is always room for cake."

"And ice cream," Dawn said.

"And ice cream," Xander said and Buffy rolled her eyes playfully.

"That's my man," Teresa said leaning over and stroking the hair at the nape of Xander's neck. 

"Okay so where's my cake? And my presents?" Buffy asked.

Andrew and Jack came out carrying a huge cake. Sparklers lighted the purple frosted cake. Kennedy followed with presents. They set the cake in front of Buffy and everyone gathered to sing happy birthday.

"Aw, you guys," Buffy smiled.

"Speech!" Robin called out. 

"Yeah, Buff, say something," Willow said.

"No, I can't," Buffy said blushing.

"You only turn thirty once," Xander reminded.

Andrew who had his video camera clicked the red record button. "C'mon Buffy, the camera's rolling."

Buffy rolled her eyes, "Fine," she stood up and watched the sparklers on her cake. She couldn't think of anything to say. She swallowed, "Thank you. Thank you all. And not just for this wonderful party, but for everything." She looked down at her little girls. Madison reached up to hold her hand. "You two, are the best things that ever happened to me. I live for you." She looked at Xander and Willow. "There are so many things I wish I told you guys, but I never had to, because you guys already knew. Dawnie, you're my sister and I love you. You all have been such a big part of my life. We've been through everything. A lot of people say that, but we are the only ones who honestly know it." She squeezed her eyes shut, holding back tears. "It's been a tough road. We've lost so much, but gained so much more. So, thank you for being here." She finished and looked up at her friends. Xander, Dawn, and Willow were all smiling at her with tears glistening in their eyes. Behind the camera Andrew sniffled loudly. Even the kids all looked solemn. 

Faith wiped her face with the back of her hand. "You'd better blow out those candles before the cake explodes." And everyone laughed. Buffy bent over and blew them out. 

"What'd you wish for, Mommy?" Hope asked. 

Buffy smiled. "Nothing. I already have everything."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* 

Later that night, they all sat around in Dawn and Jack's living room, drinking and talking. All the kids had tired themselves out and were now sleeping in Billy's room and the twins room. The house was big enough that everyone was staying over. Buffy's present's were scattered around. She loved the stuffed pig and almost cried again when Xander gave it to her, Willow's present made her cry though, Dawn gave her sister a garnet necklace, Andrew gave her a limited edition Dorothy Hammil figurine, and Faith gave her vibrator, as a gag gift, and a book about growing old. Buffy was having such a good time. They played silly games, like Truth and Dare and Spin the Bottle, both in which Xander had to kiss Andrew. He rinsed his mouth out with Scope afterwards. Of course, they were all a little drunk. 

"I don't know why Xander's being such a homophobe," Willow commented, obviously drunk. "I want two." She threw down two cards.

Her, Buffy, Faith, Jack, Robin and Andrew were playing poker. Buffy, the dealer looked at Willow and handed her two cards. She could see Willow's hand in the silly giant glasses Xander bought her. 

"I am not being a homophobe!" Xander protested. He returned to the table where he, Teresa, Kennedy, and Veronica where playing Scrabble.

"Yes, you are," Willow told him.

"Am not!"

"Homophobe."

"Bluffer."

"I am not bluffing!"

"Uh, yeah you are Will," Robin said.

"We can see your hand in your sunglasses," Buffy confessed.

Willow looked shocked. "You've all been cheating off me?"

They nodded sheepishly. And Willow burst out laughing. "You guys were cheating off me for beans?" 

"It is stupid currency," Jack admitted. "But we don't have poker chips."

"If you thank that's stupid, you guys should try playing for kittens," Buffy said. She looked down at her cards, blinking back tears. She pushed back her chair, "I'm out." She set her cards down on the table and went to the kitchen, taking her glass with her. She downed the vodka and cranberry juice, grabbed un unidentifiable bottle and poured amber liquid into the empty glass. She downed that quickly. "Bleah," she made a face and poured another glass. Stupid memories. She wished she could ask Willow to do a permanent forget spell, but her friend wouldn't do it. She closed her eyes. ***'And the only person I can stand to be around is a neutered vampire who cheats at kitten poker!' That night in the demon bar, where Spike had taken her to find out what was after her. She had had one too many drinks and was ranting about her problems and her friends. And Spike was there. He was always there. And then he wasn't. For five years he wasn't. And she hated him again.

She finished off her third glass when Andrew poked his head in. "Uh, Buffy? Me and Veronica are leaving, now."

"What?" Buffy set down her glass. "Why?"

Andrew shrugged, "Veronica has an early class."

"But you can't drive. You're drunk," she said to him.

Andrew smiled. He wasn't the drunk one here. "Actually, I didn't drink and besides, we walked over."

"Oh. Well, I'll walk you guys back, just in case," she said.

"It's all right Buffy," He opened his jacket, "I came prepared." Buffy saw a small bottle of holy water and a wooden cross with a pointy tip.

"Then I'll walk you to the door," She took a couple of wobbly steps and Andrew caught her before she tripped flat on her face. "Or, you'll walk me to the door."

"Okay." Andrew held Buffy up as they walked to the door. Everyone hugged Andrew and Veronica good-bye. Xander opted for a manly handshake. "Happy Birthday, Buffy" Andrew whispered in Buffy's ear. 

"Thank you," She whispered back. Jack opened the door and a familiar figure was standing in the doorway, cigarette in mouth, hand poised ready to knock.

"Uh, hi?"

  


To be continued.....


	7. Spike

  


Chapter Seven: Spike

(The rating just went up. PG-13. Also, I've been listening to The Police and became inspired. So the next couple chapters have mentions of songs.)

  


_"I have stood here before inside the pouring rain_

_With the world turning circles running 'round my brain_

_I guess I'm always hoping that you'll end this reign_

_But it's my destiny to be the King of Pain"_ "King of Pain" written by Gordon M. Sumner aka Sting

  


He threw a couple of crumpled dollar bills onto the counter at the Circle K. "Keep the change" he muttered. The cashier took it nodding. He walked outside opened the pack of cigarettes, threw the wrapper on the ground, and lit one. He took a long drag. It had been almost three years since last he had one. Last time he had a cigarette was when he saw her. That night. That awful, wonderful night. 

He'd been on a errand for Angel that night. After he came back, he went to Angel for help. Figured he'd know what to do. Bugger didn't, but offered, rather reluctantly, Spike a place to stay. Angel owned Wolfram & Hart, that evil law firm. Apparently, he and Lilah, the sultry CEO, made a deal. Angel came to work for them and he could give his son Connor a new life. Spike didn't understand a bit of it, but then again, he never really understood his grand-sire. 

So, he had been doing lap dog work for Angel, trying not to think about Buffy, when a vampire jumped him from behind. Spike wrestled with the vamp for a good while when someone grabbed the vamp and dusted him quickly.

"Hey!" Spike said getting up and dusting himself off. "I was just about to..." he stopped. His rescuer was the last person he thought he'd ever see. Standing there, staring at him incredulously, was Buffy. "Buffy?" He took a step forward, and she took a step back.

"Who are you?" She demanded. Her face was eerily calm. 

He didn't understand. He smiled, "Buffy, it's me." He took another step but she kept backing away.

She shook her head, "No, you died. Who the hell are you?" 

"You're not making sense, Buffy," he was getting irritated. "Stop." She did and allowed him to approach her. 

She looked into his eyes. Those intense, gray-blue eyes. "Spike?" She whispered. She reached up to touch him, but punched him in the nose, instead.

"Ow! Slayer! The nose!" He held his face, blood trickled from his nostril. She stalked away. He ran after her, "Buffy!" He grabbed her and turned her to face him.

"What the fuck!" She exclaimed. "How the hell?! Why...?! How are you here?!"

He wiped the blood. "Funny story, actually. Kind of long, so if you want to go get some coffee..."

"Don't give me that shit! You died. Explain," She crossed her arms. 

"I would but... duck!" He shoved Buffy out of the way of an attacking vamp. He punched it and it went down. It jumped up and kicked Spike. Spike went flying and it went after Buffy again. Buffy kicked it a couple times. Spike jumped up, grabbed it and pulled out his stake.

"Stop!" She yelled before he staked it.

"Huh?" Spike and the vampire were confused. 

She grabbed the vamp by the shirt collar and swung him around, plastering him against the side of the wall. "Tiny Tim," she said. "Tell me where he is."

"Go to hell, slayer," he spat.

"Been there," she grabbed Spike's stake from his hand and dug it into his chest. "Where. Is. He?"

"Okay! Okay! I might know something," he screamed. Buffy stopped. "He's not far. A joint called Hades." 

"I know where that is," Spike spoke up.

"Thanks," Buffy smiled at the vamp and rammed the stake into him.

"Whoa. You've changed. The old slayer would've had a little more mercy," Spike commented.

"Don't talk to me," She said coldly. "Show me where this place is."

"Buffy..."

She flashed his eyes at him. She was pissed, so he backed off. "Okay, okay," he said putting his hands up. "I'll show you."

  


Spike flicked his cigarette butt, the ember disappeared into the shadows. He lit another. He had already gone through a third of his pack and was getting thirsty. Jumping off the hood of his car, he went back into the convenience store. 

He went straight for the liquor cabinets. Nothing but beer and he needed something a helluva lot stronger. 

"Jack Daniel's and another pack of Marlboros," He told the clerk."Back again?" The guy got him a forty ounce and the cigarettes and put them in a brown paper bag. 

Spike nodded and pulled out his money. "Never left," he said. "Shouldn't have left," he muttered under his breath. The clerk handed Spike the bag and Spike went back outside. He sat on top of the hood again of his '76 Monte Carlo. He twisted open the cap of the whiskey bottle and took a good swig. That was the stuff. It burned him as it coursed down his esophagus. 

  


***"You want a drink or something?" Spike asked her as they sat up on barstools. Spike took her to Hades, the demon bar the vamp had mentioned. She gave him a Look.

"Right," he beckoned for the bartender. "A glass of your finest for me and the bird." The bartender put two mugs of pale green liquid in front of Spike and Buffy. 

Buffy made a face at the drink. "What the hell is this?"  
"Yak piss," Spike replied. "Drink some."

"I am not drinking that. I came here for information," she said.

He rolled his eyes, "Hey mate," he called the bartender back over. "We're looking for this bloke, Tiny Tim. Owes me a dozen Gava beans. Y'seen him?"

"What do you want with Tiny Tim?" The vampire next to Buffy asked.

" 'Scuse me, but I believe I was talking to him," Spike said. 

The vamp hopped off his barstool and approached Spike. "Well, now I'm talking to you."

"And yet, I don't care. So, sod off," Spike replied.

"Maybe you'll care when I take your girl away from you," he said grabbing Buffy's arm. 

A smirk crept across Spike's face, "Big mistake."

Buffy grabbed the vamp's arm, twisted it back in a way that Spike could hear the bones snapping. She lifted him up by the throat and slammed him down on the bar. "He told you to sod off!" Buffy said. 

"I knew it! Slayer!" The vampire managed to choke out. The entire room fell hush and turned to Spike, Buffy and the vamp.

"Bloody hell," Spike muttered. He seized Buffy by the hand and ran out the door. The demonic mob chased them until Spike and Buffy doubled back and hid in a dumpster. When the coast was clear, they climbed out. Buffy started to head back to her motel room.

"Where you going?" He asked her.

"Back to my motel room." She kept walking. "I smell like garbage thanks to you," she replied.

"You're saying this is all my fault? I'm sorry, pet, but I'm not the slayer. I don't have evil beasties and Big Bads after me all the time."

She glared at him. "Shut up. Don't talk to me."

"I thought you wanted to know what happened to me," he said.

"Well, now I just don't care. So, go to hell Spike." She said.

"Buffy!" He jogged up to her. "C'mon, you can't just leave like this."

"You did."

"Oh yeah, I really had a choice as I was being burned from the inside out trying to save your beautiful arse!"

"Damnit Spike. Don't turn this around on me," She stopped. "You've been alive this entire time and you didn't try to find me or at least call me. How hard is it to pick up the phone and go 'Hallo Buffy?' " She said in a bad English accent.

" 'It's Spike, you know, the bastard who sacrificed himself for you. Well, I came back from the dead.'! " She started walking again.

Spike glowered at her, "That's right. I sacrificed myself for you and for your little Scooby gang and to save the world. Hell, Buffy, what do you want me to say?"

"Nothing. Don't say anything. I don't want to see you ever again," she said. He watched her walk off, dumbfounded. 

  


_"I guess this our last good-bye_

_And you don't care so I won't cry_

_And you'll be sorry when I'm dead_

_And all this guilt will be on your head_

_I guess you'd call it suicide _

_But I'm too full to swallow my pride"_ "can't stand losing you" written by Gordon M. Sumner aka Sting

  


To be continued...


	8. Magic

  


Chapter Eight: Magic

(This chapter contains lyrics from "Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic" written by Gordon M. Sumner aka Sting)

  


_***_That night Spike had followed Buffy all the way to her motel, which was just outside of the Los Angeles city limits. He watched her enter her hotel room. He pulled out a pack of Marlboro's from the pocket of his leather duster. When he came back, he was in the same clothes he was wearing that day. He had burned all his other clothes, but couldn't seem to part with the soft, black leather duster. It had become a part of him, and he didn't want to let another thing he loved so much go. He looked at the door. Debating whether or not to barge in right now, or wait till the brink of dawn.

  


_"Though I've tried before to tell her  
Of the feelings I have for her in my heart  
Every time that I come near her  
I just lose my nerve  
As I've done from the start"_

He muttered angrily under his breath. "Damn girl. Gonna be the death of me." He put the cigarette to his lips. First one he had had in five years. He had given up drinking and smoking when he came back. Besides, he wasn't allowed to smoke inside Wolfram & Hart and didn't like going outside every time he had a nicotine craving. He dropped the butt and stepped on it. He wasn't going to wait till morning. He had to see her again now. He walked up to the door, wiped his sweaty palms on the seat of his jeans and pounded on the door

Buffy threw the door open. "What?!" She asked angrily. Spike looked at her. Her gorgeous green eyes were red, her nose runny. Her hair was still wet from her shower and her robe was disheveled. His heart leapt. There she was, in the worst possible shape and she still looked beautiful. 

_"Every little thing she does is magic  
Everything she do just turns me on  
Even though my life before was tragic  
Now I know my love for her goes on"_

__"Can I come in?" He asked.

"No she said. She stood in the doorway, blocking him. 

He shook his head and scoffed. "Fine," He pushed past her. "I don't need an invite."

"Her eyes widened. "You're not... You came in."

"Yeah, I did. It's a public place, Buffy," he told her.

"Oh," she closed the door. "What do you want?"

"We need to talk, Buffy." 

She raised her eyebrows, "Really? Funny, I don't feel the need to talk. I feel the need for you to leave, though."

He rolled his eyes, "Still with the snappy remarks. You need a new shtick." "Did you come here just to heckle me?"

He sighed, "Listen, I know you're mad..."

"Mad?" She laughed. "I'm way past mad. In fact, I think I'm somewhere in uncontrollable rage."

"Fine, whatever. I wanted to explain..."

"Explain what?!" She yelled. 

"Bloody hell, woman, let me finish!" 

"No!" She screamed. She flew at him, fists flying. He cowered down, letting her hit him. Finally, he grabbed her arms and shoved her up against the wall.

"Buffy, settle down."

She twisted. "Then explain. Why you're here? Why you've been gone? Why you didn't come to me when you got back from wherever you were? Why you let me spend every day for five years without you? Without kissing you, or holding you, or without falling asleep in your arms. You..." Her bottom lip quivered. "Weren't there." she finished. 

He let go of her and she slid to the floor, sobbing those horrible gasping sobs. He sat on the lumpy bed and hung his head. What had he done? What did he do to her? He thought he was doing what was right, staying away from her. It would've been just fine if they never saw each other again. Living what lives they didn't have, going through the motions, deadened to what surrounded them. That's how he had been living. And he was pretty positive that's how she had been living. 

_"Do I have to tell the story  
Of a thousand rainy days since we first met  
It's a big enough umbrella  
But it's always me that ends up getting wet"_

__He looked back at her. She was on the floor, crying into the dingy carpet. He watched her. Like he had done a million times before. Memorizing every curve, every line of her body, every pore on her face. She was older than when he last saw her. There were the tiniest wrinkles around her eyes, but only he would notice them. She seemed worn, older too. He watched as she clawed at the carpet. On her left hand, on the finger next to her pinky was a gold diamond ring and band 

"You're married?"

"Yes," she mumbled her voice muffled by the carpet.

He nodded. "Oh."

She looked up at him. "What'd you think I was going to wait for you? You were dead."

"I'm not dead."

"I didn't know that."

Spike looked down, holding back burning tears. "Is he... uh... is he good to you?"

"He was."

"Was? Did he leave you?" His eyes flashed. "He left you didn't he!" He stood up. "Does he know wonderful you are? Poncy bugger, I'll kill him. 

She shook her head and sat up against the wall. "Spike, sit down."

He didn't listen, he kept pacing around yelling, "Left you. Stupid git. How could he leave you?"

"Why don't you ask yourself?" She said.

"What?"

"Ask yourself that question."

He blinked at her, realizing what she was talking about. "Oh, Buffy." He sat back down on the edge of the bed. "God, I'm so sorry. Buffy, I am so sorry. But you have to understand what I did, I did for you."

"You mean saving the world?. I do. I don't understand why you stayed away. If you came back, why didn't you come for me? Was it because you didn't believe I loved you?" She asked.

Spike looked at her, flashing back to the cavern crumbling around around them. 

  


***"I love you."

"No you don't. But thanks for saying it." ***

__

"Buffy I love you."

"Yeah, but you didn't believe I loved you. That's why you didn't come for me." She said starting to cry again. She pulled her knees to her chest and set her head down. 

Spike crawled over to her. "I did believe it." He lifted her chin up. "I knew you loved me even before you knew it. But I couldn't tell you I love you then. If I did, then you would've stayed. And don't give me that look. I know, Summers, only too well. I wasn't going to let you go down with me in my moment of flame and glory."

She bent her head down, crying again. He kissed the top of her head. Her hair was drying and he ran his hand through her hair. IT wasn't as long as before. Just past her shoulders, perfect. "Shh, love. Don't cry." He cradled her in his arms. "Hey, you want me to go out and beat your so-called husband senseless?"

She sighed. "No. You can't."

"C'mon, Buffy. It'll make both of us feel better."

"You can't because he's dead."

"Dead?"

"Yeah, two months ago. Vampires."

"Tiny Tim?" 

She nodded, trying not to cry anymore. "He wanted to send me a message. Did a good job, too. Now I'm going to send him a message by sending my stake through his heart."

Spike shook his head. Leaning his head back, he put the pieces together. That's why Angel had sent him looking for a vamp named Tiny Tim. He said the the bloke was organizing a cult of vampires. He never said anything about him killing Buffy's husband. He chucked, "Oh, Peaches, you damned, silent martyr."

"What?"

"Nothing, pet. Just marveling at the irony. "

She frowned at him. She got up to her feet. Stretch her arms out and lied on her bed. He watched her from where he sat. He smiled and tilted his head in a such a way. She stared back at him. He was sitting, back against the wall, left leg straight out, right leg bent up, his right arm resting on his knee. That smirk, the way he tilted his head when he looked at her. Like he knew something about her that she didn't. 

"Are you just going to sit there all night?" She asked.

"I could. Sit here, staring at you all night. I haven't done that in a good while." He replied.

She propped herself up on her elbow. He breathed in.

_"Every little thing she does is magic  
Everything she do just turns me on  
Even though my life before was tragic  
Now I know my love for her goes on" _

"Tell me something." She said. 

"Anything, love."

"Where were you?"

"Don't know," he confessed. "All I remember is you, the cave collapsing, a incredible burning sensation, then nothing. Not nothing. Peace. I felt peace. And I heard a little voice telling me that you, the nibblet, and everyone had made it out. Then I opened my eyes, and I was still in god-awful town. I thought it was hell." She giggled. He smiled at her and continued. "I climbed out of the crater and hitchhiked all the way to L.A, stopping and resting during the day."

"You were in L.A?"

"Yeah. I hooked up with Angel and he welcomed me with... Well, he didn't really welcome me as much as he did turn ghost white and glared." 

"Angel never told me anything."

He shifted, "Yeah, 'spose he didn't. I told him not to mention anything 'bout me. Figured that was best, you not knowing."

"You guys have really stop doing that."

"Don't I know it. Anyway, I've been staying in L.A ever since. Helping Angel out whenever he whistles for me."

"That's it?" She asked. "That's what happened. The Powers That Be just sent you back?"

He shrugged, "That's the lot of it." 

She shook her head, "Whatever." She yawned. 

"I should get going. You're tired," Spike said getting up and going to the door.

"No!" She said rushing to him. He raised his eyebrows at her. She looked down, then back up at him. "You don't have to. You can stay."

That's all it took. That one little eye roll up from her big green eyes peering at him through her thick lashes. "Okay," he cupped her face in his hands kissing her deeply, desperately. He needed her and she needed him. She pushed him back against the door, kissing him passionately, tugging at his bottom lip. He squeezed her by the shoulders, lifting her up and spinning her onto the bed, not missing a beat. She let her hands wander down undoing his pants as he wriggled off his jacket and tore off his shirt. He tried to do it fast, he didn't want to stop kissing her. He never wanted to stop kissing her. He untied the belt on her robe and slid his hands under her, caressing her smooth skin. 

"Spike..." she gasped.

"Shh... love," he whispered. He ran his lips down the middle of her body, kissing her throat, her collarbone, along her breastplate to her belly button. She ran her hands through his hair. It was still bleach blond, but didn't have as much gel. He started kissing her on the lips again and back behind her ear. He slid into her gently and it was just like he remembered. They fit together, and nobody could tell him different. Not the Powers, not Angel, not death, not even Buffy. He knew they belonged together. They both reaching the breaking point and just laid there afterwards. She snuggled up against him, head on his chest, feeling the rise and fall every time he breathed, listening to the sound of his heartbeat. She sat up. "You're heart. It's beating!" 

He closed his eyes. "You just noticed."She covered his mouth and nose. He coughed. "What are you trying to do? Kill me?"

"You're breathing!" 

"Yes, it's what humans do." He coughed out.

"You're human?!" She shouted.

"Yeah." 

"When were you going to tell me?"

He shrugged, "The day I came back."

"Augh!" She screamed. "Get out!" 

"What'd I do now?"

"You didn't tell me that you were human!"

"What? You can't tell the difference?"

"No!" She yelled. "Get out!" She pushed him off the bed, and out the front door to daylight. He grabbed his duster. And she slammed the door.

"Pants!" He bellowed. She opened the door and threw his jeans out at him. He looked around. A family and a man at the ice machine stared at him. "Right." He pulled on his pants. "Nothing to see here." *** 

  


Spike downed the last of his forty. He wasn't the slightest bit drunk. Not even a tiny bit buzzed. "Good lot that did me," he chucked the bottle into a garbage can. That night had been something. But that's what their relationship had always been. Something. There was no title for what they had. You couldn't call it a marriage, or even a boyfriend/girlfriend thing, they weren't just snogging buddies either, because they both had feelings for each other. He didn't know what to call it, but he liked it. He got in his car and turned the key. The ignition roared on. He flipped the radio to a station of classic rock and pulled out of the parking lot. Buffy told him to come back tonight. It was already close to midnight and he didn't want to come in the morning. Eight years of being a human again, and he still couldn't do the day thing.

  


***He waited outside for her on a car parked in front of her room. until dusk. She came out, pulling her arm through her sleeve. She looked up and glared at him.

"What are you doing here?" 

"Waiting for you." He handed her a styrofoam cup of coffee. "Here."

She glared at him again and accepted the cup. "This doesn't mean I'm not still mad at you."

"Fine." 

She sipped the drink. It was just the way she liked it. Sweet, not a lot of cream. "Don't you have somewhere to be?"

"No. Figured I could just tag along with you, watch your back," he replied.

"Uh huh." 

They went back to the bar they were at last night. Buffy pounded some guy for information and they found Tiny Tim's lair. Of course, it was swarming with vampires, but most scampered off, when they saw the slayer, afraid that more were on their way. They battled Tiny Tim, who was anything but tiny.

He knocked Buffy back into Spike. "Y'know, they really should start using the right words to describe themselves," she told Spike. 

"C'mon, slayer," he growled. "I've been waiting for this."

She kicked him hard and he stumbled. He retaliated by grabbing her by the head with his massive hand and throwing her across the room.

"Buffy!" Spike called out, but he was fighting off two vampires at a time.

Buffy pushed herself up and Tiny Tim walked over and pressed his foot down on her chest, cracking a rib. He laughed, "Don't win this time, slayer." He forced her into the concrete. "Say hello to your hubby for me." Buffy's eyes flashed and she grabbed the vamp's foot, twisted it and he spun onto the ground. She flipped herself up. He got up and made to punch her but she blocked it easily. Punch, punch, back hand, she sent him flying with a kick into some boxes. She grabbed him and pulled him up, she picked up a piece of jagged wood. But before she could dust him, Spike yanked her back, and drove his own stake into the vamp's heart.

"Why did you do that?!"

"Hey, a little gratitude, here," he said.

"He's the one who killed David!" She yelled. 

"I know. I couldn't let you kill him.' 

"Why?"

"Because you would've killed him out of anger. You kill someone out of anger and hate, be it vampire or not, it sears into you." She stared hard at him. She wasn't sure what he was talking about. "Don't look at me that way," he said. He stepped over the large pile of ashes and took her hand. "I couldn't let you kill him. Any other vamp, sure, but that one you would've killed out of vengeance, and that leads down to a dark path."

"I've killed hundreds of vamps when I've been angry," she pointed out.

"Yeah, but not one who killed someone loved," he told her. "Remember Faith? Her mother was killed by a vamp and she she killed that vamp. That was the beginning of the end for her."

"I thought she was crazy before that," Buffy said. 

Spike chuckled, "Probably, but do you understand?"

She nodded, "Yeah, thank you." He looked into her eyes, he was still holding her hand, she hadn't yet pulled away. Usually this would be the part she kneed him in the groin or punched him in the face and ran off. She moved into him and caressed his cheek. She kissed him, lightly at first, then parted his lips with her tongue, meeting with his and stroking it. The kiss became more heated when she pushed him against the wall. He let her have her way with him. Let her run her hands down his chest and under his black shirt. Let her bite his bottom lip, it drove him wild. Let her claw her nails into his back. Let her reach down, passing ever so gently over the throbbing in his jeans. 

"No," he reluctantly pushed her back. He opened his eyes to see her looking up at him, bewildered. He sighed. 'Bollocks,' he thought. 'You're completely mad, Spike. Y'know that?' He smiled at her, "Let's get you home."

They went back to her motel room. "Stay here," she told him. "I'm going to take a shower. There's some Ho-Ho's on the dresser, if you're hungry." She left him sitting on the bed while she went into the bathroom. She had been here for a good while. There was a bag on the dresser, various toiletries were scattered about. There weren't just some Ho-Ho's, there was a whole arsenal. He shook his head. How could she eat all that junk and still have that hot little body? He passed up the sweets, he was never one for junk food. He poked around her stuff he found a couple bottles of anti-depressants. The girl had been living on nothing but junk food and pills. 

He opened the bottles and poured out the medication. All pills were accounted for. She hadn't been taking them. He grabbed the bottle and walked to the bathroom door. He put his hand on the knob. He hesitated. 

_  
"I resolve to call her up a thousand times a day  
And ask her if she'll marry me in some old fashioned way  
But my silent fears have gripped me  
Long before I reach the phone  
Long before my tongue has tripped me  
Must I always be alone?"_

He didn't want to get into another fight with her. He stuck the bottle in his pocket. He could hear the water running. He turned the knob. She left the door unlocked. Sly little minx. He slipped into the bathroom. Steam rose from the shower. She hadn't yet seen him. He stripped off his clothes and pulled back the shower curtain. She let him run his hands down her slippery body. He kissed the back of her neck and she leaned into him. 

They made love in the shower. Something they had never tried before. Surprisingly enough. They spent the rest of that night lying on the bed, facing each other. Buffy watched him sleep. He must've been dreaming because his eyes were moving beneath his lids. His lashes were quite long, she loved his sharply defined cheek bones, and full bottom lip. She traced the scar on his eyebrow he still had. He didn't stir. She looked at his pectoral muscles and washboard abs. He really had washboard abs. She had never realized how small he was. Angel had strong, broad shoulders, and Riley was like a football player, muscular arms. Even David was bigger than Spike. Yet, Spike was strong, toned, and had a perfectly sinewy body. She lightly kissed his lips. His eyelids fluttered open.

He looked at her and smiled. "Hello love," he whispered.

"Hi."

He closed his eyes again and flipped over onto his stomach. He was drifting back to sleep. Buffy kissed his cheek and fell asleep. Spike reached out for Buffy but instead he felt emptiness. He opened his eyes. She wasn't there. He stumbled towards the musty curtains and pulled them open, blinding himself. He shut the curtains, it had to be after twelve. He pulled on his jeans and looked around the room. None of her stuff was there either. She left him. She took off while he was sleeping. Guessed much hadn't changed. He got the rest of the way dressed. He didn't bother looking for a note, it wasn't her style. The pills were still in his pocket as was a pack of cigarettes. He peeled the label of the bottle and poured them down the drain. He went outside, lit his cigarette and walked away. She hadn't left a number, or an address of course. He started back to L.A, back to Angel, back to what life he didn't have before he saw her. He planned to give Angel a piece of his mind, maybe threaten him a bit and then demand to know where Buffy was. But decided against it, Buffy obviously didn't want him to know where she was, or else she wouldn't have left. He smirked to himself. ***

_"Every little thing she does is magic  
Everything she do just turns me on  
Even though my life before was tragic  
Now I know my love for her goes on" _

(To be continued...)

(It's been really fun writing these last two chapters. I'm glad everyone's enjoying it. If anyone's confused, just e-mail me.)


	9. The Guest

Chapter Nine: The Guest

"Uh hi?"

The entire room stared at the stranger at the door. Jack was the first to recover. He didn't know what was going on. "Hello? Can I help you?"

"I uh... I'm here for her," He said nodding at Buffy. Ugh, he didn't sound so much like a stalker when he had been practicing what to say in his head. 

"Who are you?" Jack asked suspiciously.

"Spike," Dawn's voice was barely audible. She went to her husband's side and stood in front of the ghost. 

"Nibblet? Dawn?" Spike looked at her in amazement. His bit had grown into a full fledged woman. 

"Spike!" Dawn exclaimed throwing herself at him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and squeezed him tight. "Oh my god!" 

He hugged her back. "Easy there, bit," he said.

She let go. "Oh sorry, are you hurt? Where've you been? How are you alive? Oh my God, come in."

Jack held the door open and Dawn took him by the hand and had him sit in a chair. "Do you want anything?" Everyone, still in shock, gathered around.

"Am I the only one who sees him?" Xander asked.

"Yeah, we're all pretty drunk," Kennedy said.

"Pinch me," Xander said. Spike reached over and pinched Xander hard. "Ow-ow!" He glared at Spike and rubbed his upper arm.

Spike smirked, "Awake enough, wanker?"

"Um," Jack raised his hand. "Not to interrupt this reunion, but... Who is he?"

Dawn gave him a Look. "He's Spike. You know, the one I told you about."

"Oh, but you said he died in Sunnydale."

"That's right, he did! Why are you back?" Xander asked.

"Guys, guys, give him some breathing room... or whatever," Willow said. "BUffy? Are you okay?" 

Buffy who hadn't moved at all nodded. Her eyes glazed over. "I've gotta go," she said and ran out the back door. 

"Buffy!" Spike stood up to go after her but Faith held him back.

"Let her be. This is pretty damn traumatic for her," she told him. He sat back down reluctantly. 

"Right. So, who's up for a big story? Spike, I believe you have the floor," Xander said.

Spike rolled his eyes. "What do you want to know?"

"Everything!" Dawn exclaimed. "Like where you've been? How you got back? Why you're back?"

He shrugged, "Not much to tell. I died, again. Woke up, found myself in the Sunnydale crater. Got out. Found Angel and been workin' for him."

"What is that? The Cliff's Notes version?" Faith said. "We need details."

"There aren't any," he said.

"Then why'd you come here? How'd you find my house?" Dawn asked.

"I had seen her the other night. Told me to come tonight. She wasn't home, so I asked a neighbor for direction's to your house. Told her I was your cousin." He replied.

"Wait, Buffy told you? You mean, she knew you were alive?" Xander asked.

"I saw her in L.A 'bout two years ago. Her husband had died," he replied.

"David died and she went looking for the vamps who killed him," Dawn said. 

"She never told us anything," Willow added.

He shook his head, "She wouldn't." He stood. "Listen, much I'd love to chat. I really want to talk to Buffy." The group nodded and he disappeared outside.

"Wow," Willow breathed. "Spike's alive." 

"And human," Robin added.

"I can't believe Buffy knew about this for over two years and never said anything," Dawn said shaking her head.

"Spike's right, though. She wouldn't have said anything," Faith replied. 

"Why? I'd have thought she would've been happy. You know the whole 'my boyfriend's back from the un-dead' thing?" Kennedy pointed out.

"Maybe he didn't die," Andrew spoke up. 

"What?"

Andrew swallowed. "Uh... there's this prophecy. Shanshu. It tells of the Champion sacrificing his life and coming back human."

"Human?!" Xander's eye bugged out.

"How do you know?" Robin asked. 

"I still do research for Buffy when she needs. She asked me about this... about two years ago?"

"Two years ago," Willow whispered. Realization hit. "Oh. That's why she didn't say anything."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* 

  


"Buffy?" He found her sitting on the swing set in Dawn's backyard. He walked over and sat in the swing next to her. "Are you okay, pet?"

"Stay away from me," she grumbled.

"Not this time."

"I'm serious Spike. I've been drinking and I might throw up on you." She told him. She glared up at him. "I probably should though."

"You're a mean drunk," he said. 

"Why are you here?" She asked him quietly.

"Aw, Buffy not again," He groaned. "I'm not going through this again."

"I want to know."

"I told you. It's that Shanshu nonsense..."

"No," she interrupted. "Why are you here?

Spike frowned at her. He didn't understand what she was asking. He was here because of her, because he gave himself for her, and was rewarded. Not much a prize so far. He wasn't with her. He rolled his eyes at himself. "Oh." He brushed her hair back away from her face. "You. I'm here because of you." She looked at him and he sighed. "You are the reason I'm alive. You made me a man. When I saw you, that night, I couldn't breathe. I was drowning in you. All those nights and days away from you, I yearned for you.

"Then why'd you stay away so long?"

"Why did you leave that night? He countered. "I had made up my mind not to leave you again, but that time you left."

"I was scared." She confessed. "Scared that it was a dream. That if I woke up in that motel room and you weren't there, I wouldn't be able to handle it anymore. I would've given up right there. Then I thought of Hope. I remembered my little girl. So, I left. I let you rest." She said. 

"I don't believe that. That was just an excuse."

"You're right, it was. But an excuse was all I needed. How many excuses did you come up with not to come to me?"

"Just one. Hope. You had a chance at a normal life."

"Yeah a chance," she scoffed. "Somehow being the slayer always gets in the way of that."

"Of course it does. It's the card you were dealt."

"Are you just another card?"

"That's all I am to you? Tell me this, Ace or King?" He said trying to make her smile. A smile crept out unwillingly from her lips. God, he lived for that smile. "Knew I could get a smile." He reached into his pocket and pulled out that label from the bottle of pills. "You were taking these?" He showed it to her.

"You went through my stuff?"

"What? You're surprised?"

She rolled her eyes. "I was supposed to be taking them."

"And you didn't."

"Nope."

"I stopped smoking. And drinking."

"You did?"

"Yep, until I saw you again. The first time and this last time."

"I'm bad for your health."

"Don't I know it."

"You should stay away from me, again."

He shook his head. "Stop with the pity song already. Listen to me, I admit it I shouldn't have stayed away from you. But you can't blame all this on me just because you're pissed off at yourself. It doesn't work that way anymore. I'm not your whipping boy. I hurt you and you hurt me, that's what's called a relationship."

Tears were streaming down her face and her head hurt. "A relationship? Based on what? We can't be together, look at what it's doing to us. We hurt each other too much."

"I told you before Buffy. You always hurt the ones you love."

"Not this much Spike. It's too much."

"Damn it, Buffy!" He roared. "When are you going to stop these excuses and admit that you love me?"

"I did admit it!" She spat back. "And you didn't believe me." He looked hard at her. 

"I did believe you. I told you I did." He was hurt. She dared looking back at him. He was staring off into the night. "You were right when you said I was in love with pain. I was. I was demon and you made me feel. How can you think I love you any less now? I didn't even have a soul then and I loved you. And I figured out why." 

"Why?"

"Because you were my soul."

She reached over and took his hand in hers. "I love you."

"No you don't."

"Yes I do!"

He shook his head. "I just got you all hot and bothered with those fancy words."

She let go of his hand and knocked him off the swing. She straddled him and placed a firm, passionate kiss on his lips. "I love you Spike."

He smirked. "I know." 

  


(To Be Continued...)


	10. The Phone Call

Chapter Ten: The Phone Call

(Here it is. The conclusion. I hope you all have enjoyed it. Thank you all who have read and reviewed this story. It was fun to write. A nice getaway from "I Move On". Don't worry though, I'm still writing "I Move On". Thank you again.)

  


"Dawn... I know. Okay, be mad then," A week had passed since her birthday party. She was on the phone with Dawn who was still upset at her for not telling them about Spike. "Dawn... Dawn... Shut up. I don't care. Yeah, okay. We'll come over tomorrow. Fine. Love you too. Bye." She hung up the phone. Good Lord that girl could hold a grudge.

"Mommy!" Hope came running up dressed in pink pajamas. "Are you going to tuck me in?" 

"Yes, come on," she picked Hope up. Madison was already in bed. She stared up at the ceiling as Buffy kissed Hope on the head. She sat on Madison's little bed. "What is it?"

Madison whispered, "An angel told me sumping."

"What?"

"That my daddy isn't in heaven anymore. And my mommy's happy now," she replied looking at with her daddy's eyes..

Tears stung Buffy's eyes. "Go to sleep okay?" She got up and closed the door to their room, leaving it open just a crack. She went into the kitchen and started putting away the dishes. The phone rang and Buffy growled. She picked it up, "Dawn, I swear..."

"Buffy?" 

"Angel?"

There was a pause.

"Happy Birthday," he said.

"You're a little late, but thanks."

"I know. I got held up by a pack of Cranglar demons outside of San Fransisco."

"Oh."

"How are you?"

"I'm good. You?"

"Good."

"Good."

Buffy heard him shifting in his seat. "So..." 

"How come you didn't tell me he was alive?" She asked.

He sighed, "Oh man. I expected this conversation a lot earlier. Now I'm not prepared."

"Well?

"He asked me not to. I knew what he was going through, so respected his wishes."

"You respected Spike?"

"It was out of pity."

"I saw him Angel."

"I know. He told me."

"No, I saw him two years ago. When David died."

"Oh. Oh... that's why he was so weird. Buffy, you should've seen him. He was a wreck. I figured it was about you. It's always about you. Finally, I told him to get out of my hair and just go see you."

"What'd he say?"

"Oh, uh 'I'll git out of your stupid, bloody hair when I feel like it, Peaches.'" Angel said in a perfect imitation. 

Buffy giggled. "Did that take a lot to tell him that?"

"It did. But I couldn't stand him moping and brooding about in my office."

"Yeah that's really annoying," she said teasing Angel.

"Hey!" Angel tapped his foot on the floor. Any ways, I gave him your address against my better judgment."

"He found me."

"And?"

"We talked. A lot. Got it all out." She replied.

"Good. Buffy, I want you to know that he loves you. As much as I hate to admit it. You two belong together."

"You think that?"

"Call it a momentary lapse in sanity." She laughed after a long pause he said, "You know, I'll always be here, though. Not getting any older."

"Angel?

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

"You're welcome. Can I ask you something?"

"What?"

"Are you a cookie yet?"

She smiled. She walked into her bedroom and looked at the man sleeping in her bed. "I think so."

"Good night, Buffy."

"Good night Angel."

Buffy set the phone down on her night stand and climbed into bed. She settled next to him. He pulled her closer wrapping his arms around her. Buffy smiled. Madison was right. She was happy now. 

  


The End


End file.
